aoa SB, i feel awkward being the one advising u but ive learned k we should make some rules n include our kids in the process,like how much time can they have for computer, etc. once we come to an agreement, there should be no argument n if there is, there should be a penalty like i tell my daughter that u cant hav lunch until uve had a bath n i usually stick to it. which reminds me that once u make a rule, stand by it otherwise kids will know k they can get their way around by some manipulation n cry baby attitude.be polite but firm n give them good alternatives
9/15, 11:04am
SB
lolzzzzz...parenting is something that we learn from each other...seriously I think much younger mothers are better than me
9/15, 11:04am
Sadaf Usman
i guess we all know these things but wen the actual time comes we all are too driven to act on impulse n not cool headed- 9/15, 11:04am
SB
so I am all ears to learn on this front
my problem is, I can't take the tantrum, I give up easily...
I am mentally occupied with my studies so much that I can't stand the buggin... - 9/15, 11:05am
Sadaf Usman
thats so healthy attitude coz i believe that one should be open to learn n admit that there can b better ways than what we did - SB
Of course, the generation is changing quite fast...we have new challenges all together - 9/15, 11:06am
Sadaf Usman
well if u set a time through mutual agreement, tantrums can give u a reason to cancel even that
like these days my deal with my beti is k i wont tease her n she wont throw tantrums - SB
We did settle on time, two hours a day...but then they start breaking the rules - 9/15, 11:07am
- 9/15, 11:07am
SB
they resist on their homework...
they dont want to clean up
they are not organized at all...
my daughter (12) going to high school now still wants me to choose her clothes for school which makes me sick
she should be doing her stuff on her own now
- 9/15, 11:09am
Sadaf Usman
this calls for a family meeting i guess
u should ask them what they like about their life n what they dont, about u ,themselves n eachother..a time of reflection maybe n u can share with them too ur own feeling - 9/15, 11:11am
- 9/15, 11:11am
Sadaf Usman
like i tell my beti how upset i feel when she misbehaves etc , how it disturbs me n makes me feel like a bad mom, not doing a good job
she tells me she doesnt like when i get angry at her n that makes her more angry
i didnt know this n was surprised k my temper makes her lose hers
that was quite helpful so i realized k if i keep my tone low, she wont go high too
once u guys are open about ur feelings, n complaints
u can start on the path of solution.but first we need to identify the problem
like if ur son could go out with friends , would he b fine with 1 hour of gadget
maybe he needs more activity in life - 9/15, 11:13am
SB
In our case, the problem is their craziness about Ipod and tablet
Sadaf kids in North America are so addicted to these things, you won't imagine
they are watching youtube videos and vines all day frown emoticon - 9/15, 11:14am
Sadaf Usman
u should give this stuff away:D
keep a laptop n that too time locked
or use this as a threat n act upon it
but dont make them feel like the losing party,infact, do it as a family.make a win win situation out of it - 9/15, 11:15am
- 9/15, 11:17am
Sadaf Usman
u really should then i guess.i havent bought these coz with a laptop n a mobile, i have enough to keep track of i feel
would b healthy infact
just do it in a way k they dont feel like ure an enemy
n yeah
first create some alternatives
like what will they do in that time if no tablet or ipad
theres a website, coursera.org
where they can join online courses
n many more im sure - 9/15, 11:19am
SB
I am planning to create a defect in their gadgets evil mom
seriously....
then they have netflix on my smart TV
I repent, why did I buy the smart technology....it's awful
lolzzzzz - 9/15, 11:20am
Sadaf Usman
SB someone once said k if u dont want ur kids to eat junk food, dont bring it in your home
i guess that fits here too - 9/15, 11:20am
SB
anyways, nice chatting with u, keep in touch and I will definitely try the family meeting thing soon
ya, my husband told me....warned me - 9/15, 11:20am
- 9/15, 11:21am
- 9/15, 11:21am
SB
but then social pressure, all the other kids in their circle have these stupid gadgets and they felt left out
like poor kids who don't own gadgets... - 9/15, 11:21am
- 9/15, 11:21am
SB
living in the west create some dilemmas as well
now that they had them, i guess its time to defect them
Tuesday, 15 September 2015
Everyone needs a rahbar in their life (part1)
RAHBAR IS A TWO WAY ROAD
YOU THINK, QUESTION AND SEEK ANSWERS, TOGETHER!!!
It was like an oasis in the desert. i had been wanting to do something but with 3 small kids, a full time job was out of the question. That is why when I heard of TCF RAHBAR, I was quite excited.
Only seven Saturdays, 4 -5 hours each time, pick and drop facility, it seemed pretty much possible. All I knew was we would go to a TCF campus in the city and spend time with grade 9 students there, mentoring on life skills.
it seemed a little vague to me and when i attended the orientation, the confusion
grew.
"The kids will amaze you,"," this experience will change you," i have come for my own self", "the program has given me more than i could give it," were some of the views old mentors shared with us and i just didnt know what it all meant.
we were divided into groups,one group for each campus (almost 12 volunteers in our group) with a coordinator to manage the team. i knew absolutely no one and was already having second thoughts. anyway, we introduced ourselves and had a little discussion and then it was time
to leave. i liked the team i was working with. they were decent, polite, friendly people who were pursuing very interesting careers and degrees. it felt
great to see young, girls exploring their potential and stepping into the world with confidence.
i was paired with a co-mentor and as a team we had a group of four students to mentor.
working with a stranger to mentor 4 more strangers, it seemed quite
challenging, more when you are a person who doesnt open up so easily. but i took it as a job that demanded us to share our personal experiences with
the kids so that they could learn from them and so i did. We were to gather at the stop at HKB, from where we were taken in TCF VANS to the beautiful TCF campus as noorpur, as distant as the name sounds:) but soon, we volunteers got so comfortable that the ride became a joy!!
At the campus, we started off with getting to know the kids, names, interests, family, siblings, good and bad habits
and so on. it didnt come easy. while they seemed in awe of the bajis who had come to spend time with them, their eyes sparkling with excitement, they didnt
want to give any negative impression and so were reluctant to share their weak side. however, when we began being honest about ourselves, our mistakes as
daughters, our selfishness and impatience as sisters, a slight smile of understanding began to appear on their lips as if they knew what we meant and
realized how they tend to do the same at times. Being the eldest, middle, youngest or only child seemed to make a difference and it helped to know it to
understand them better. having known what it feels to be a daughter and a mother, I could tell them what goes in the heart and mind of both. Ami may say shes
not hungry just because she wants you to eat to your hearts content. She may not say it, but she would love a hug and a kiss once in a while. She may be
upset at you because she is tired and would calm down the second you take that bucket load of laundry from her and wash it yourself. and while we talked about
all this, we were listening to ourselves too, and realized how wrong we had been on so many instances. It was a bitter sweet realization that made us want to
rush over and hug our moms and thank them for all they had done and borne.
another interesting observation was when we asked them who was their most favourite person in the world. the answer was unanimous; the person who cared for and loved them the most. for some it was their father who brought them special treats,for another it was her brother, for one it was her cousin who was always there for her and listened to her. This in itself became a definition of what traits make a person special for someone; one who loves and cares for them. so if they want to become special for someone, that was the route to take.
We discussed the professions of their parents and realized that hard work with honesty is worthy of respect, irrespective of what you do. We couldnt help feeling ashamed how we discriminate the farmers, plumbers, carpenters, painters and mechanics in our society, instilling a low image of them in our kids minds too as if it would be below them to do something like that in life. 'Dignity of labor' had only been a set of words for us but that day we understood its true meaning. These girls had parents who were toiling night and day to give them a better life than they had and we had no right but to instill in them pride and gratefulness for what their parents did, not shame and embarrassment. it was really cute to have one of them state the profession of her father as a farmer instead of a 'kissan'. It seemed as if she felt it will hold more respect in our eyes if she stated it in english.
We talked about the importance and purpose of education, a question we ourselves had trouble finding the answer to. Is education merely a means to make money, to get rich, to find a degree and job? Or is there a greater purpose, a higher objective!!! It was a struggle to arrive at an answer after quite some brainstorming.
Education is meant to give you the realization of your own capacities and capabilities, to assist you is discovering and digging out the potential you were born with, to help you attain the level of ashrafulmakhluqaat that you were bestowed with, to give you a sense of right and wrong, the courage to practise goodness despite all hurdles and the bravery to condemn evil regardless of what may be the consequences!! It is meant to give you the drive and determination to carry on come what may, to not give up, to stay positive, to not accept defeat or failure, to stay in the race even if you come last for what chance you have by standing out!!!
TO BE CONTINUED.....
Living Under a Shadow
Parents sometimes themselves become a cause of friction between siblings
'She's nothing like Maria!I don't know who she's taken to!' were the words of Maha's mother who was once again comparing Maha with her elder sister. While Maria was responsible, intelligent and outgoing, Maryam was careless, reserved and lost in her own world. The two undoubtedly had their own unique personalities but the contrast was too troubling for their family who unconsciously had started making regular mention of it on a daily basis.
Such situations are common spectacles in our households where siblings are very openly and insensitively discussed and compared with each other and what's worse, it is done in their very presence. While parents may think it is totally harmless and the kids dont have a clue of what they are talking about, kids consciously or unconsciously take influence from such discussions. Those admired feel more confident as well as burdened with expectations while those condemned/criticized further envelop in their cocoons, their confidence reducing even more, their self respect falling down, anger and frustration boiling inside them.
Another major downside of this scenario is the creation of animosity amongst siblings, who start eyeing each other as rivals or enemies, each regarding the other as the cause of trouble in her life. The responsible one blames the other for all the extra work she may have to do because of her carelessness while the careless one may blame the other for being too goody-two-shoes, trying to be mama's sweet heart. Moreover, if parents are adamant on raising clones, hardly anything the slow one would do will succeed to impress them for they would always compare it with the smart kid, who might have done it better or earlier at his stage.
Achievements of one lurk like a shadow over the other's head who unsuccessfully seeks to step out of it and stand in her own light. Be it school or home, either one is given example of his/her sibling to perform or improve like her. I remember how a friend's brother hated her for acing her exams for, he, a year younger to her, had to bear the brunt of it all, teachers one after the other saying, ' Your sister used to be so brilliant, what is wrong with you?'
What is considered as a way or encouraging or motivating becomes a reason for grudge and anger and what could become an extraordinary relationship becomes a raging battle of the nerves. Many avoid going to the same place together for fear that he wouldnt be able to make his mark with the persona and popularity of the other dominating the room. And it becomes worse if one is lesser 'good looking' than the other (by society's silly standards!)
I have some similar issues with two of my daughters, the younger one mostly less in demand, the eldest one basking in the attention being showered upon her by her cousins and friends. I dont blame her for she,being the eldest is used to being the centre of attention but I do try to sensitize her about her sister, encouraging her to include the little one in group activities and play. At times it works, at times it doesnt but I continue my job, drop by drop hoping for and witnessing results. At times I tell them stories about brothers and sisters who hush off the other because she is too young to play that particular game but then learns how wrong he was to do that. Thank God for this tender age as at this time they are avid listeners and absorb whatever you want them to learn.
Also sometimes I only take the younger one to a cousins or friends place so that she can have her own space to explore and discover life without having to constantly compete for attention in a battle where the odds are naturally not in her favour. This actually helps as when I took my younger one for her school interview, I saw a new side of her. Gone was the shy, timid Maryam and there was the confident, friendly little girl who had no issue in interacting with the head mistress and comfortably talked with her. Although our reason to send her to a different school is something else, but it has given her that space and air to bloom and blossom independently, without comparisons, at her own pace, in her own way.
Im seeing improvement already. Both are learning to love and share with each other, respect each other for their strengths and feel happy for each other (I think that is most important) We have consciously started making effort to appreciate them when they play together and share. We try not to give them examples of each other to motivate them but compare their behaviour with their own at a past moment. However, I think I still need to work harder on assuring them that they are not in a competition but are partners in a team and while other people may come and go, they wont find such lasting friendship elsewhere.,,,,,
'She's nothing like Maria!I don't know who she's taken to!' were the words of Maha's mother who was once again comparing Maha with her elder sister. While Maria was responsible, intelligent and outgoing, Maryam was careless, reserved and lost in her own world. The two undoubtedly had their own unique personalities but the contrast was too troubling for their family who unconsciously had started making regular mention of it on a daily basis.
Such situations are common spectacles in our households where siblings are very openly and insensitively discussed and compared with each other and what's worse, it is done in their very presence. While parents may think it is totally harmless and the kids dont have a clue of what they are talking about, kids consciously or unconsciously take influence from such discussions. Those admired feel more confident as well as burdened with expectations while those condemned/criticized further envelop in their cocoons, their confidence reducing even more, their self respect falling down, anger and frustration boiling inside them.
Another major downside of this scenario is the creation of animosity amongst siblings, who start eyeing each other as rivals or enemies, each regarding the other as the cause of trouble in her life. The responsible one blames the other for all the extra work she may have to do because of her carelessness while the careless one may blame the other for being too goody-two-shoes, trying to be mama's sweet heart. Moreover, if parents are adamant on raising clones, hardly anything the slow one would do will succeed to impress them for they would always compare it with the smart kid, who might have done it better or earlier at his stage.
Achievements of one lurk like a shadow over the other's head who unsuccessfully seeks to step out of it and stand in her own light. Be it school or home, either one is given example of his/her sibling to perform or improve like her. I remember how a friend's brother hated her for acing her exams for, he, a year younger to her, had to bear the brunt of it all, teachers one after the other saying, ' Your sister used to be so brilliant, what is wrong with you?'
What is considered as a way or encouraging or motivating becomes a reason for grudge and anger and what could become an extraordinary relationship becomes a raging battle of the nerves. Many avoid going to the same place together for fear that he wouldnt be able to make his mark with the persona and popularity of the other dominating the room. And it becomes worse if one is lesser 'good looking' than the other (by society's silly standards!)
I have some similar issues with two of my daughters, the younger one mostly less in demand, the eldest one basking in the attention being showered upon her by her cousins and friends. I dont blame her for she,being the eldest is used to being the centre of attention but I do try to sensitize her about her sister, encouraging her to include the little one in group activities and play. At times it works, at times it doesnt but I continue my job, drop by drop hoping for and witnessing results. At times I tell them stories about brothers and sisters who hush off the other because she is too young to play that particular game but then learns how wrong he was to do that. Thank God for this tender age as at this time they are avid listeners and absorb whatever you want them to learn.
Also sometimes I only take the younger one to a cousins or friends place so that she can have her own space to explore and discover life without having to constantly compete for attention in a battle where the odds are naturally not in her favour. This actually helps as when I took my younger one for her school interview, I saw a new side of her. Gone was the shy, timid Maryam and there was the confident, friendly little girl who had no issue in interacting with the head mistress and comfortably talked with her. Although our reason to send her to a different school is something else, but it has given her that space and air to bloom and blossom independently, without comparisons, at her own pace, in her own way.
Im seeing improvement already. Both are learning to love and share with each other, respect each other for their strengths and feel happy for each other (I think that is most important) We have consciously started making effort to appreciate them when they play together and share. We try not to give them examples of each other to motivate them but compare their behaviour with their own at a past moment. However, I think I still need to work harder on assuring them that they are not in a competition but are partners in a team and while other people may come and go, they wont find such lasting friendship elsewhere.,,,,,
Monday, 14 September 2015
WHY JOIN RAHBAR?
- free pick n drop from stops near your home
- great opportunity to make new friends
- networking with people from diverse professions and backgrounds
- opportunity to improve communication skills
- discovering how all humans have dreams, problems, strengths, weaknesses yet what sets them apart is how they handle them all
- understanding different mindsets and realizing how you fall prey to self pity or rise to face challenges
- journey through the amazing,lifechanging milestones
- redefining and reflecting upon purpose of education, success,failure, happiness
- self reflection, analysis, improvement
- culture of positivity, non judgment, cooperation
- exploring the world beyond your own world
- identifying mindsets and mindset management
- opportunity to hear inspiring, memorable talk from hero speaker
- PARTY!!!!:DDDDD
Thursday, 6 August 2015
When your own Bully you....!
Until I had researched on it, I always thought bullying was something strangers did to you. However it was shocking and hurtful to find that bullying can be done by your own loved ones(family and friends), all in the name of love, without the least bit of guilt or shame. Infact the one bullied is further criticized as being too feeble to not take a few jokes in good stride!
A child is a complete human being, fully equipped with a functioning mind and heart, that sees, hears, understands and interprets, maybe more than we'd like to believe. However, many a times, children are taken non seriously, even as a source of entertainment by adults who derive amusement from teasing and taunting them and whats worse is that if the kid reacts, it is taken as a sign of being too fragile and bad-sport.
I'd like to share one such instance where a younger child was constantly being tickled by her elder cousin who paid no heed to her protests and when the younger cousin finally hit her in frustration, the elder called her ill mannered and boring. It was difficult to make the elder one understand that although she may be younger, she is a free person and has full choice of how she'll like to be treated and this freedom and choice of her should be respected. However, the statement, "So what if I tickled her? She didnt have to overreact like that, maybe she needs a lesson or two in manners!" was passed very confidently. While many may not realize it, this is a perfect example of bullying where the bully is not only unaware but also refuses to take any responsibility for the entire situation. He, very casually, teases or calls names to someone younger or weaker than him, causing humiliation or discomfort, and then when the younger one explodes or reacts, he blames him for being too mushy and aggressive. Those around, if raised in the same unhealthy environment, also see nothing wrong with it, but on the contrary find a protest against it weird and over protective!
Bullying is a term that is most commonly associated with school environment where mostly some sort of physical abuse like pushing, cornering or other forceful actions are involved but it also includes emotional and mental bullying which can be even more damaging as it can be in practise by your own friends or family without them or even you realizing it. One fears danger and threat more from outside than from his own loved and trusted ones and that is why, when your own family bullies and belittles you, calling you names, bringing up embarrassing past events, dampening your moment of joy with guilt and shame, making fun of your appearance, intellect or talent, the damage can be disastrous! If such bullying comes from your own loved ones, it is bound to put you in doubt of your own self and your self worth. If some stranger does it, you will find comfort in the fact that he may be just a mean person by nature, but if someone you love and respect does it, it is bound to hurt you even more and so much deeper, leaving permanent marks on your personality! Often parents, siblings and other relatives justify all this as their way of expressing love and affection and complain if the child doesn't take it with grace. They may ridicule and mock the kid, touch the chord they know will make the most sound and then further ruin it by labeling him as a sob story (ye kuch zada he nazuk hai, itna sa mazaak bardassht nahe hota!)
Bullying can occur at any age and in any relation. Sometimes, just for the fun of it, relatives, cousins or even parents tease a child by not letting him have the toy he wants. They bring it forward and then when he is about to grab it, they pull it back. What may be their idea of fun appears totally sick and annoying to the child who is bound to react with cries and wails. If this pattern continues, the child makes it his habit and grows up to exercise the same with younger kids, finding it totally okay and harmless, infact most amusing! It can be extremely difficult to stop it as those (parents) who should be stopping it are the ones casually doing it, more because, "He's my kid, i can say or do to him as i please!" Well, while he may be your kid, he is not your property. If your child says or shows that he doesn't like being teased, don't tease him! Just because you are a parent doesnt mean you can do as u please. You too are bound by the commands of Allah, even in parenting! Moreover, imagine the damage it would do to his 'self' to see that his own parent doesn't hold him in much regard, Yes, I believe kids want to be respected not ridiculed. In spiritual terms, physically we may appear small, but the rooh is born mature, n stays the same age all our life! So what we want as adults, we pretty much want that as kids too!
Many times kids who are bullied become bullies themselves, spreading the same bitterness that they were fed. Sometimes entire families are in the habit of bullying and their favourite prey are those kids who are not accustomed to it as they are most likely to react. The mothers of such kids are put in a very tricky situation as when their child, who is not used to being treated as an emotionless toy reacts, their mothers are told to harden them up and teach them a thing or two about how to behave and take such nonsense with grace! The fault does not lie with her parenting but their mindset, that sees children as mere source of entertainment. She raised him as a complete person, who has his own likes and dislikes that he is used to being respected, who has his own strengths and weaknesses that he is used to being handled with sensitivity and care, who has his own will and choice that he is used to being listened to with compassion and understanding.
The fault lies with those who try to be overbearing and controlling, who get a high from his moment of low, who seek his weak spot and then hit upon it until it hurts bad, who consider it completely okay to have a good laugh at the expense of ridiculing and belittling him.They may have borne such bullying and have come to accept it as a cultural or social norm but it does not take rocket science to understand that if something brings tears to someones eyes or causes anger, frustration or embarrassment, it must hurt!
The next time you see another human being especially child, (whether big,small, old, young, white, black, stranger, friend, literate, illiterate) just know that he is as much a human as you and deserves every bit of respect, sensitivity and freedom!
To put it in a nutshell, in the words of Sri Devi from English Vinglish, "Family can never be judgmental. Family will never put you down, will never make you feel small. Family is the only one who will never laugh at your weaknesses. Family is the only place where you will always get love and respect."
Sunday, 2 August 2015
THE BUSINESS CALLED EDUCATION!!!
Education is a very noble profession but like most other professions in our country (like the food or health business) , education is also without much rules and regulations. Schools open up in streets and lanes, irrespective of the size, location, facilities, class strength, parking area and standard of curriculum and staff, fees charged as per the desire of the institution.
Rs.50,000 is a normal admission and registration charges for schools while the book list and related stuff is another story. Mere registration which is non refundable can be as much as Rs.5000 and the admission list and deadlines for different schools are so messed up that you cant wait for all the lists to be up to take a proper decision having a clear idea of where you stand in the admission list. One school that puts up its lists first may reject admission if dues are not paid within the deadline that may be before the other schools list is put up so parents are left in a bizarre situation where they may end up paying fees for two schools instead of one or risk their luck!
I remember when i was in college and first year admissions were in progress, a mother came to me and in a very humble way requested if I could in some way find out whether her daughter had cleared the interview so she wouldnt have to pay fees in the other college she had applied to. The thing was that XYZ college list would be put up on 20th while last date of payment of fees for ABC college was 15th where her daughter had been admitted. She couldnt afford to pay in ABC and then pay again for XYZ as that is where she preferred her daughter goes to. I felt really bad for her and did this favor for her but what about the many other parents who faced the same situation? why isnt a proper system in place that makes sure that all admission lists and fee payment deadlines are aligned so that parents can weigh their options comfortably and then pay only for the college they desire to?
The story doesnt end here. There are more ways of money making in this business. Schools make deals with book shops, publishers and uniform shops in return for the heavy commission (rishwat) these parties pay to the school management and hence the school management bounds parents to purchase the required items from the schools approved bookshops and publishers only, not even providing a book list to the parents, saying that the bookshop itself has it. Then there are the sports fund, arts fund, miscellaneous fund, endowment fund, library fund, medical fund, student welfare fund, college welfare fund, building fund, general fund, academic development fund. magazine fund, red crescent fund, parking fee, development fund and you add it up to quite a wholesome amount!
While I try not to doubt the sincerity and commitment of the institutions, I would like to know where do all these funds go and how are they utilised for the benefit , security and comfort of the students ? The students and parents do have a right to know and track where and how their money is utilised so that they are more than willing to contribute towards a better learning environment and facility for their child. However, parents too are quite laid back in this matter and are partly to blame for the dues and charges to raise in such a horrendous manner. They dont become one voice and one power to demand effective changes in the education system that is more parent and student friendly.
Rs.50,000 is a normal admission and registration charges for schools while the book list and related stuff is another story. Mere registration which is non refundable can be as much as Rs.5000 and the admission list and deadlines for different schools are so messed up that you cant wait for all the lists to be up to take a proper decision having a clear idea of where you stand in the admission list. One school that puts up its lists first may reject admission if dues are not paid within the deadline that may be before the other schools list is put up so parents are left in a bizarre situation where they may end up paying fees for two schools instead of one or risk their luck!
I remember when i was in college and first year admissions were in progress, a mother came to me and in a very humble way requested if I could in some way find out whether her daughter had cleared the interview so she wouldnt have to pay fees in the other college she had applied to. The thing was that XYZ college list would be put up on 20th while last date of payment of fees for ABC college was 15th where her daughter had been admitted. She couldnt afford to pay in ABC and then pay again for XYZ as that is where she preferred her daughter goes to. I felt really bad for her and did this favor for her but what about the many other parents who faced the same situation? why isnt a proper system in place that makes sure that all admission lists and fee payment deadlines are aligned so that parents can weigh their options comfortably and then pay only for the college they desire to?
The story doesnt end here. There are more ways of money making in this business. Schools make deals with book shops, publishers and uniform shops in return for the heavy commission (rishwat) these parties pay to the school management and hence the school management bounds parents to purchase the required items from the schools approved bookshops and publishers only, not even providing a book list to the parents, saying that the bookshop itself has it. Then there are the sports fund, arts fund, miscellaneous fund, endowment fund, library fund, medical fund, student welfare fund, college welfare fund, building fund, general fund, academic development fund. magazine fund, red crescent fund, parking fee, development fund and you add it up to quite a wholesome amount!
While I try not to doubt the sincerity and commitment of the institutions, I would like to know where do all these funds go and how are they utilised for the benefit , security and comfort of the students ? The students and parents do have a right to know and track where and how their money is utilised so that they are more than willing to contribute towards a better learning environment and facility for their child. However, parents too are quite laid back in this matter and are partly to blame for the dues and charges to raise in such a horrendous manner. They dont become one voice and one power to demand effective changes in the education system that is more parent and student friendly.
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